How to Get Kids to Listen without Yelling

Get Kids to Listen

Kids are similar to other people: they may sometimes not listen to you. However, there are strategies that help get kids to listen to you.

When dealing with kids, you have to teach them how to listen to others. What often happens is that parents repeat one thing 10 times and then start counting down to punish the child. The result is that the child learns never to listen to their parents before the tenth time. So what is the best way to get kids listen without yelling or having to repeat directions a hundred times?

Your child will try to get your attention by not listening to you, which is not always a good way of paying attention to the baby! But if your child can learn the art of listening and hearing you well, it will help him / her improve the learning process; they will give more attention to the warning signs; it will help him / her with you and his or her teachers and other adult. With strategies that help get kids to listen, children learn that they are expected to respect their parents and teachers better, and also help them make better friends.

There are simple strategies that if you use them consistently, your child will learn the skills needed to become a “good listener.” Remember that it is never too early to teach your baby! Even a 4-year-old child can still hear and learn a great deal.


Sit at the kids’ level to get kids to listen

All parents sooner or later realize that talking to a child while you are standing rarely has the right effect on the child. Of course, if you start talking or screaming from another room, you will get less! To get kids to listen, sit or hug the child in front of you so that you can look directly into their eyes and get their attention. If you sit next to them at the breakfast table and remind them to eat his corn chips or sit on their bed at night and talk to them before turning off the lights, they will pay more attention to you.


Speak clearly to get kids to listen

Say what you want in a clear, simple and authoritative way. If you are overly cautious about talking about a subject, the child will not pay much attention. If you use too many words, your child will not be able to grasp your exact meaning. “The weather outside is really cold. You have been sick lately. So you have to put on your jacket before you go to the store.” can be long and distracting. On the contrary, a sentence like “You should wear a jacket” is straightforward and helps get kids to listen. If your child has no other option and can only do the job you want, it is best not to make your sentence in question form. For example, “It’s time to sit in your car” is much better than saying “Will you sit in the car baby?”


To get kids to listen, stand by what you have said and do it immediately


To get kids to listen, stick to your word

To get kids to listen, make it clear to the child that you will do exactly what you said; and do not threaten or promise anything unless you can fulfill it. For example, if you say to your two-year-old baby, “You should have milk after dinner,” don’t change your mind five minutes later, offering juice instead of milk. If you warned your kid that “if you beat your brother you should stay in your room for half an hour” send the kid to the room for half an hour if the beating actually happens. Make sure that your spouse also approves of your work and respects your decisions so that you do not ruin each other’s work.


Reinforce your message and words

In most cases, to get kids to listen, it is best to reinforce your message by doing some practical work, especially when you want to discourage your child from doing something wrong that is appealing to them. Say, for example, “It’s time to sleep!” then provide a visual hint (turn the light off), give a physical hint (put one hand on the child’s shoulder and gently point her/ him towards the bedroom) or directly take her/him to the bedroom (tuck them in, pull the curtains and get the pillow ready).


Give previous hint or notice

Alert him or her before making a change to his or her situation or trying to do something special, especially if he or she is playing with a doll or a friend. For example, before leaving a relative’s home, tell them, “We have to go in a few minutes. When I call you, get up and wash your hands.”

Get Kids to Listen

To get kids to listen, try to give them realistic instructions

If you tell a two-year-old boy to pick up his toys, he looks around the room and gives an indefinite answer: Well, oh! Instead, give him a specific job. Say, for example, “first collect the yellow blocks”, then turn it into a game: “Now collect the blue blocks.”


To get kids to listen, encourage and motivate them

Outbursts and ordering may make some kids listen to you, but none of them like it. Most children respond best to your requests when they are treated with kindness and patience. For example, sometimes you can talk to them in a childish or funny tone, or in a song. To get kids to listen without yelling, you can sing a song with one of the childish lyrics: “It’s time to brush your teeth”. It is better to emphasize what the benefits are if they listen to you, for example, instead of saying “you should brush your teeth or there will be worms in it” or “brush your teeth right now” say “brush your teeth and you can choose your favorite pajamas tonight”. Encourage them after they brushed their teeth: “Nice job!”

Showing humor, kindness and trust in this way of talking to the child makes the child “want” to listen to you because they know that you love them and think they are “a special kid”. This is important even in the ways that need to be toughened. Giving explicit and authoritative instructions does not mean that you have to be brutal or fast; they will be much more effective when they are accompanied by a smile or hugging a child. Then the child realizes that if he or she pays attention to you and your words, he or she will see the result.


To get kids to listen, be a model of good behavior for them

Young children will learn to listen to others if they find you listening carefully and well. Try to get used to paying attention to your baby’s words with the same respect you give adults. Look at them as they talk to you, respond politely, and let them finish without interrupting them; try not to get away from him or her while he or she speaks, though this may be really difficult to follow. In fact, like many other behaviors, you cannot tell the child, “Do what I say, but do not imitate what I do”; children learn to hear the words from your behaviors, not from your commands.


Play with your kids

The best way to get kids to listen to you is to spend more time with them and try to have fun together. Childhood is the time for experiencing, learning and development and children have an active mind. They are ready to grow through empiricism and experiencing the world, but if, instead, they spend a lot of time watching television, they are only living a vicarious or virtual life. The same is true about children being entertained with tablets and other devices. Lack of active experience and learning leads to aggressive behaviour in children. No matter how limited your space is, you can still educate and develop the various aspects of your child’s mind and body by devising simple games that allow them to experiment and learn. For example, you can devise different games with a few simple pieces. Find some colored beads that the child can separate and group according to the color, and then make bracelets, clasps, and similar items together, enlivening the child’s creativity. It is exciting to use the tools you have made with your own hands and when you spend time with the child and play with them you can clearly see the effect of this behavior on the child’s calmer attitude and language.

Caution: it is important to choose a toy considering the age of the child. For example, Play-Doh is a popular toy for children, but it is not suitable for children before the age of three because the child at that age gains knowledge for himself or herself through taking everything to the mouth. The same is true for other small toys, pencils, etc.

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